BYU 38 – SDSU 28
The offense – great! The defense – not so much…okay, so I’d prefer not to say anything derogatory towards the Cougars but I’m not about to use any panegyric encomiums to display my emotions (surprisingly, I am actually learning the useless information in my law class, go figure). Suffice it to say that the defense stepped up at the end of the game when the game was on the line and made enough plays to win. Of course, the offense contributed, too. Max Hall had zero interceptions for the second straight week. He even had some extraordinary runs to silence the naysayers. Among them, a one yard touchdown scramble as time expired in the first half to give BYU the lead going in to halftime. Dennis Pitta and Andrew “hip hip” Jorge both caught touchdowns. Even Harvey Unga did his trademark – come to a screeching halt as he crosses the goal line for a score.
Right Guard Terence Brown became Right Tackle Terence Brown in the first half when an injury forced the most versatile lineman BYU has ever seen to move over and play a position he doesn’t even play in practice. I guess that’s what makes him the man.
Finally, I must say somewhat concerning a penalty call on BYU. Look, I acknowledge that I don’t know all the rules in football, but I have seen a multitude of football games. Perhaps my ignorance is at fault, but not once have I ever seen the following call against the offense. Encroachment, #32 offense, 5 yard penalty, repeat 1st down. First of all, charging the great Dennis Pitta with such an infraction is simply absurd. Second, encroachment is a defensive penalty. Third, the reason the penalty was called was because the accused tight end came out of the huddle and stood ahead of the line of scrimmage and immediately upon knowing of the mistake and before the ball was snapped, he adjusted himself to be behind the line. This, however, wasn’t enough and he was called for a ridiculous penalty. Luckily, this play had no bearing on the game or else I might have been forced to use the title of “jerk” for this referee.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
COLLEGE GAMEDAY BUILT BY THE HOME DEPOT!!!
Can you believe it? ESPN and the crew are going to be in Provo this homecoming weekend as we take on the #8 TCU Horned Frogs (according to today's freshly released BCS rankings). There will be an electric atmosphere as the entire city converges on Lavell Edwards Stadium for this heavyweight matchup from 10 o'clock in the AM until kickoff at 5:30 Mountain Standard Time. So everyone grab a parka and park-a your butt outside the staduim all day and you might be lucky enough to be on national television. It ought to be a dandy. The only question I have is who will have the misfortune of having their mascot adorned on the head of Lee Corso as his projection of the winner? We'll just have to wait and see...
Friday, October 16, 2009
Fantasy Football
This week culminates in a clash of fantasy football titans as Sledgefest (1-3) takes on Cowboys Forever (2-2). You may be asking yourself why a matchup of seemingly mediocre teams merits such fanfare. Well, these are our fantasy football teams that collide this weekend and the winner will receive bragging rights for the remainder of the football season and possibly beyond (assuming this doesn't tear our friendship apart). It should be grand. Results are forthcoming.
You also may be thinking that a team named Cowboys Forever, which is fraught with players of the real Dallas Cowboys, could in no wise compete due to the bye week for said Dallas Cowboys. You would be mistaken to assume such an assumption. These Cowboys Forever and their awe-inspiring fight song are exceptionally versatile and will make up for this setback with relative ease. That’s right Sledgefest, I’m calling you out! (Oh, and no quips about how you’ll let your players do the talking)
You also may be thinking that a team named Cowboys Forever, which is fraught with players of the real Dallas Cowboys, could in no wise compete due to the bye week for said Dallas Cowboys. You would be mistaken to assume such an assumption. These Cowboys Forever and their awe-inspiring fight song are exceptionally versatile and will make up for this setback with relative ease. That’s right Sledgefest, I’m calling you out! (Oh, and no quips about how you’ll let your players do the talking)
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Home away from home
BYU 59 – UNLV 21
Well I was about to chronicle our adventures to Las Vegas and the BYU game, but I remembered the advice a wise sage (Matt R.) once relayed to me- What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. Well, his version was a little dirtier than that. Plus, the only stuff that stays in Vegas is stuff that you're ashamed of, and we are dang proud of our Cougars.
It was a blowout from the beginning of the game. Max Hall was on target, throwing for more than 300 yards and 2 TDs with no interceptions. Harvey Unga also ran for 149 yards and had 3 touchdowns. Nine different receivers caught passes and seven different players ran the ball as the Cougars amassed over 600 total yards. The defense was rocking. Geneva would have had a hey day with all the bone crushing hits. The D had the away crowd oohing with all the solid strikes. Not only that, but they picked off 3 errant passes. One was a one-handed pull-in from out of bounds by Jordan Pendleton (or Jan Jorgenson according to the announcer) and another was a diving snag by Scott Johnson (who also had the other INT).
In my haste to celebrate the accomplishments of the team, I failed to make mention of the most excellent occurrence of the night. Ocho Siete made his debut in the fourth quarter. He ran some great routes and was often wide open. Unfortunately, BYU ran the ball pretty much every time. We could have been up by 50 points if the ball got into 87's able hands.
Big man Terence Brown also played well. The coaching staff eventually took him out of the game so the UNLV defense could nurse their wounds and broken pride. (And as a side note... he does not resemble the Michelin Man. This is clear to me now. He is more like the offspring of the Incredible Hulk and Brad Pitt. Please don't hurt me...)
Other notes-
• I’m not sure, but I think the play-by-play announcer at the game was spinning a roulette wheel with the names of the BYU defensive players after each play to determine who made the tackle on the previous play. It took him 2 and half quarters to start getting the names right.
• While their stadium is much smaller, UNLV has it figured out. Some guy got $500 for kicking a field goal from the 5 yard line. They play AC-DC and Metallica instead of Star Wars. We weren't drowned with corporate sponsors. The fans sat down the entire game, drank beer, and heckled a BYU girl because she was breaking the honor code by wearing short shorts.
• By the end of the game, the only people left at the game were BYU fans who made up about half the stands. It actually got loud when BYU was on defense.
• One last note from a friend who went to the game with me. Do the Rebel dancers graduate to become peep show dancers? Slap a boa on that ho-a and they are just about there.
For my next article, I may chronicle the rest of our adventure. Or I might just leave it to your wildest imaginings...
Well I was about to chronicle our adventures to Las Vegas and the BYU game, but I remembered the advice a wise sage (Matt R.) once relayed to me- What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. Well, his version was a little dirtier than that. Plus, the only stuff that stays in Vegas is stuff that you're ashamed of, and we are dang proud of our Cougars.
It was a blowout from the beginning of the game. Max Hall was on target, throwing for more than 300 yards and 2 TDs with no interceptions. Harvey Unga also ran for 149 yards and had 3 touchdowns. Nine different receivers caught passes and seven different players ran the ball as the Cougars amassed over 600 total yards. The defense was rocking. Geneva would have had a hey day with all the bone crushing hits. The D had the away crowd oohing with all the solid strikes. Not only that, but they picked off 3 errant passes. One was a one-handed pull-in from out of bounds by Jordan Pendleton (or Jan Jorgenson according to the announcer) and another was a diving snag by Scott Johnson (who also had the other INT).
In my haste to celebrate the accomplishments of the team, I failed to make mention of the most excellent occurrence of the night. Ocho Siete made his debut in the fourth quarter. He ran some great routes and was often wide open. Unfortunately, BYU ran the ball pretty much every time. We could have been up by 50 points if the ball got into 87's able hands.
Big man Terence Brown also played well. The coaching staff eventually took him out of the game so the UNLV defense could nurse their wounds and broken pride. (And as a side note... he does not resemble the Michelin Man. This is clear to me now. He is more like the offspring of the Incredible Hulk and Brad Pitt. Please don't hurt me...)
Other notes-
• I’m not sure, but I think the play-by-play announcer at the game was spinning a roulette wheel with the names of the BYU defensive players after each play to determine who made the tackle on the previous play. It took him 2 and half quarters to start getting the names right.
• While their stadium is much smaller, UNLV has it figured out. Some guy got $500 for kicking a field goal from the 5 yard line. They play AC-DC and Metallica instead of Star Wars. We weren't drowned with corporate sponsors. The fans sat down the entire game, drank beer, and heckled a BYU girl because she was breaking the honor code by wearing short shorts.
• By the end of the game, the only people left at the game were BYU fans who made up about half the stands. It actually got loud when BYU was on defense.
• One last note from a friend who went to the game with me. Do the Rebel dancers graduate to become peep show dancers? Slap a boa on that ho-a and they are just about there.
For my next article, I may chronicle the rest of our adventure. Or I might just leave it to your wildest imaginings...
Friday, October 9, 2009
Bro-mances
3. Jason Kidd, Steve Nash- Since it has been awhile since I've shared a relatively well-known man crush with you, I do so now. I know we are in the middle of football season, but I must take this opportunity to profess my bromantic feelings towards two of my favorite basketball players of all time. Being a Phoenix Suns fan has been exhilarating and excruciatingly painful (slight exaggeration) at the same time. One thing, however, that has never been lacking in this roller coaster ride is the presence of elite point guards in my lifetime. Starting with Kevin Johnson, Phoenix has had many great distributors at the helm. My two favorites since the days of KJ are no doubt Jason Kidd and Steve Nash.
I have a fascination with the point guard position in basketball. I have always admired the vision and creativity of these two elite point guards. When they get on the court, these guys are all about the team and making it better. I only have two questions. What drove Steve Nash to trim his glorious, greasy locks? What happened to my purple Jason Kidd shirt that I wore so often in my youth? You see, these are the questions…
So, upon knowing my adulation associated with these two athletes, you can imagine my excitement when the NBA released a commercial starring both of my favorite players a couple years back. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bcvsi8ZBbuc
P.S. Don’t worry, this is nothing like what Mel from Flight of the Conchords did to Jemaine and Brett
I have a fascination with the point guard position in basketball. I have always admired the vision and creativity of these two elite point guards. When they get on the court, these guys are all about the team and making it better. I only have two questions. What drove Steve Nash to trim his glorious, greasy locks? What happened to my purple Jason Kidd shirt that I wore so often in my youth? You see, these are the questions…
So, upon knowing my adulation associated with these two athletes, you can imagine my excitement when the NBA released a commercial starring both of my favorite players a couple years back. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bcvsi8ZBbuc
P.S. Don’t worry, this is nothing like what Mel from Flight of the Conchords did to Jemaine and Brett
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Sports Fans (part deux)
Here is a list of the five fan bases that are to be put on probation, so to speak, by the commissioners that be, here at 3rd and Pitta.
1. Boston Red Sox fans- This is certainly not the first time I have made mention of their appalling behavior and will definitely not be the last. The idea that they have somehow been tremendously unfortunate because the hated rival Yankees have nearly unlimited resources to spend each year is simply a lie. Year in and year out the Red Sox have the 2nd highest payroll, behind only their nemesis to the south. Also, how about the fact that people jumped on the bandwagon simply for their hatred of the Yankees. That was reasonable back in the 90’s and earlier this decade when the Yankees were piling up championships one after another. But with the drought, so to speak, that the Yankees have suffered as of late, it is preposterous to continue to make such an argument. So, enough is enough Red Sox fans both in Boston and around the states. Shame on you!
2. Phoenix Suns fans- I share this begrudgingly because I myself am a devoted fan of the franchise since the days of Sir Charles. However, despite my loyalties to the team, I would be remissed if I held back my feelings regarding their despicable deeds. Yes, the ownership is terrible and has ruined the franchise by trading draft picks and making poor financial decisions. Yes, the referees, injuries, ridiculous suspensions, and just plain bad luck halted one of the most exciting teams the NBA has ever seen year after year. But you can spend your whole life saying “what if?” I think it is time to move on and start anew. Of course, I don’t blame you for hating the Spurs because nobody likes them.
3. Philadelphia Eagles fans- Who do you think you are? You take rooting for your team to a whole new level of atrociousness. You cheer the injuries of opposing teams’ players as they are carted off the field. You booed Santa Claus and threw snowballs at him for crying out loud. Mark my words…These actions will not go unpunished. Oh yeah, good luck with Michael Vick.
4. Utah Utes fans- Because I just don’t like you. I don’t need a reason, do I? It’s all in fun though…mostly
5. Dave Matthews Band Fans – yep. Oh, and can you believe we have to listen to him and Kenny Chesney this whole football season? Ugh…
1. Boston Red Sox fans- This is certainly not the first time I have made mention of their appalling behavior and will definitely not be the last. The idea that they have somehow been tremendously unfortunate because the hated rival Yankees have nearly unlimited resources to spend each year is simply a lie. Year in and year out the Red Sox have the 2nd highest payroll, behind only their nemesis to the south. Also, how about the fact that people jumped on the bandwagon simply for their hatred of the Yankees. That was reasonable back in the 90’s and earlier this decade when the Yankees were piling up championships one after another. But with the drought, so to speak, that the Yankees have suffered as of late, it is preposterous to continue to make such an argument. So, enough is enough Red Sox fans both in Boston and around the states. Shame on you!
2. Phoenix Suns fans- I share this begrudgingly because I myself am a devoted fan of the franchise since the days of Sir Charles. However, despite my loyalties to the team, I would be remissed if I held back my feelings regarding their despicable deeds. Yes, the ownership is terrible and has ruined the franchise by trading draft picks and making poor financial decisions. Yes, the referees, injuries, ridiculous suspensions, and just plain bad luck halted one of the most exciting teams the NBA has ever seen year after year. But you can spend your whole life saying “what if?” I think it is time to move on and start anew. Of course, I don’t blame you for hating the Spurs because nobody likes them.
3. Philadelphia Eagles fans- Who do you think you are? You take rooting for your team to a whole new level of atrociousness. You cheer the injuries of opposing teams’ players as they are carted off the field. You booed Santa Claus and threw snowballs at him for crying out loud. Mark my words…These actions will not go unpunished. Oh yeah, good luck with Michael Vick.
4. Utah Utes fans- Because I just don’t like you. I don’t need a reason, do I? It’s all in fun though…mostly
5. Dave Matthews Band Fans – yep. Oh, and can you believe we have to listen to him and Kenny Chesney this whole football season? Ugh…
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Friday Night Fight
BYU 35- Utah St. 17
How about some payback for the Cougars. I know we beat USU last year, but they chanted "overrated" after scoring a late touchdown against us. This time their quaint following was silent from the time we scored our first TD to the end of the game. It was great to see our defense play well without forcing a lot of turnovers. The fearless Andrew Rich and Coleby “the claw” grrr Clawson were incredible. Andrew Rich recovered a fumble, made a fourth down stop, and broke up some passes while Coleby Clawson was all over Diondre Borel like a cougar on Dennis Pitta in cougar-town.
The rushing attack was again dominant going for 213 yards. Harvey Unga rushed for over 100 yards. Even Max Hall proved to be a dual threat, at least more so than that horse-man in the shampoo commercials. He ran for 17 yards in addition to his 218 yards passing.
MVP- This week’s superstar was the one, the only Dennis Pitta. I mean who are we kidding? He deserves it every week, but this week he came up large with 2 touchdowns and 83 yards receiving.
Additional notes- Can we please stop with the wave? Is there a more overrated cheer in all of football? What does that do for the team? The short answer (and only necessary answer)...absolutely nothing. Oh and to all you people up on Mt. Pious who feel it appropriate to pass judgment on the older generation who fail to continue the great tradition of the wave as it crosses their section, shame on you! Why should the old folks who come to the games be held to the same standard as the so-called vibrant student section, especially for such a ridiculous and antiquated cheer as the wave? There you have it. My rant has finished and I will now descend from Mt. Pious myself. Thank you.
How about some payback for the Cougars. I know we beat USU last year, but they chanted "overrated" after scoring a late touchdown against us. This time their quaint following was silent from the time we scored our first TD to the end of the game. It was great to see our defense play well without forcing a lot of turnovers. The fearless Andrew Rich and Coleby “the claw” grrr Clawson were incredible. Andrew Rich recovered a fumble, made a fourth down stop, and broke up some passes while Coleby Clawson was all over Diondre Borel like a cougar on Dennis Pitta in cougar-town.
The rushing attack was again dominant going for 213 yards. Harvey Unga rushed for over 100 yards. Even Max Hall proved to be a dual threat, at least more so than that horse-man in the shampoo commercials. He ran for 17 yards in addition to his 218 yards passing.
MVP- This week’s superstar was the one, the only Dennis Pitta. I mean who are we kidding? He deserves it every week, but this week he came up large with 2 touchdowns and 83 yards receiving.
Additional notes- Can we please stop with the wave? Is there a more overrated cheer in all of football? What does that do for the team? The short answer (and only necessary answer)...absolutely nothing. Oh and to all you people up on Mt. Pious who feel it appropriate to pass judgment on the older generation who fail to continue the great tradition of the wave as it crosses their section, shame on you! Why should the old folks who come to the games be held to the same standard as the so-called vibrant student section, especially for such a ridiculous and antiquated cheer as the wave? There you have it. My rant has finished and I will now descend from Mt. Pious myself. Thank you.
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Sports Fans (Part 1)
Lately I have been somewhat quizzical about fans and their bizarre behaviour (alliteration). There are an abundance of different classes of fans and they need to be categorized. Now I won’t get into how much these fans care or anything of that sort because although there are obviously different levels, that would take too much time (and I have already wasted enough coming up with these). So, here it goes:
1. Root for hometown team- In this situation, you like the team that you grow up around. These people are usually loyal to said team come what may.
2. Cheer for old man’s team- This is a common trend throughout the nation especially among fathers who are devout followers of their favorite teams. Sons all over the world want to be like their fathers. So a word to all the Dads out there- Don’t be bandwagon fans!
3. Cheer against old man’s team- This is particularly appalling behavior and you would have to be a real creep to go and do something like this. Oh, and to all you ladies who think it is fun to torment your husband by cheering for the opposing team- Shame on you!
4. Bandwagon- You have no soul...that means you Utes fans!
5. Root for local team- This occurs when you move a lot and you want to fit in with the crowd. I guess there's nothing wrong with being a sheep.
6. Team with your favorite player- This happens often if there is someone you know personally or fictitiously because they went to your favorite university.
7. Girls- Now girls have their own section. Most women, if they even follow teams, do so based on the cute guy or because they like the colors. Some even wear pink jerseys to the games because their boyfriend is Tony Romo. While I realize this is a hasty generalization, I don’t really care because here at 3rd and Pitta we love perpetuating stereotypes.
However, I have noticed some strange, nay peculiar phenomenon (alliteration?) that don’t adhere to the list above. Apparently, there are some unwritten rules (and yes, I’m sure there are some rules written somewhere about sports fan-dom) about who you can cheer for. These are as follows:
• Hispanic male- you can be an Oakland Raiders fan just by the fact that you are from a Spanish-speaking country. Cool huh?
• Resident of Provo, UT- you can be a Boston Red Sox fan because, well I don’t know why but that’s the way it is apparently. I’m pretty this goes beyond just a hate for the Yankees, too.
• Religious fans- BYU, Notre Dame, Holy Cross, TCU, and many more (no offense meant to any left out)
• People in Memphis, TN- Well, because no one should have to root for the Grizzlies…they aren’t very good.
• Those native to the states of Montana, Wyoming, Idaho, the Dakotas, Iowa, Nebraska, Maine, Rhode Island, Vermont, New Hampshire, Connecticut, Delaware, South Carolina, Virginia, West Virginia, Kentucky, Alabama, Mississippi, New Mexico, Nevada, Hawaii, Alaska, and Arkansas- Don't worry, you obviously aren't alone and most of you have a college team to share your allegiances with.
2. Cheer for old man’s team- This is a common trend throughout the nation especially among fathers who are devout followers of their favorite teams. Sons all over the world want to be like their fathers. So a word to all the Dads out there- Don’t be bandwagon fans!
3. Cheer against old man’s team- This is particularly appalling behavior and you would have to be a real creep to go and do something like this. Oh, and to all you ladies who think it is fun to torment your husband by cheering for the opposing team- Shame on you!
4. Bandwagon- You have no soul...that means you Utes fans!
5. Root for local team- This occurs when you move a lot and you want to fit in with the crowd. I guess there's nothing wrong with being a sheep.
6. Team with your favorite player- This happens often if there is someone you know personally or fictitiously because they went to your favorite university.
7. Girls- Now girls have their own section. Most women, if they even follow teams, do so based on the cute guy or because they like the colors. Some even wear pink jerseys to the games because their boyfriend is Tony Romo. While I realize this is a hasty generalization, I don’t really care because here at 3rd and Pitta we love perpetuating stereotypes.
However, I have noticed some strange, nay peculiar phenomenon (alliteration?) that don’t adhere to the list above. Apparently, there are some unwritten rules (and yes, I’m sure there are some rules written somewhere about sports fan-dom) about who you can cheer for. These are as follows:
• Hispanic male- you can be an Oakland Raiders fan just by the fact that you are from a Spanish-speaking country. Cool huh?
• Resident of Provo, UT- you can be a Boston Red Sox fan because, well I don’t know why but that’s the way it is apparently. I’m pretty this goes beyond just a hate for the Yankees, too.
• Religious fans- BYU, Notre Dame, Holy Cross, TCU, and many more (no offense meant to any left out)
• People in Memphis, TN- Well, because no one should have to root for the Grizzlies…they aren’t very good.
• Those native to the states of Montana, Wyoming, Idaho, the Dakotas, Iowa, Nebraska, Maine, Rhode Island, Vermont, New Hampshire, Connecticut, Delaware, South Carolina, Virginia, West Virginia, Kentucky, Alabama, Mississippi, New Mexico, Nevada, Hawaii, Alaska, and Arkansas- Don't worry, you obviously aren't alone and most of you have a college team to share your allegiances with.
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